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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 30 Jan 2019, 19:21

:rofl :rofl

I guessed the frozen chicken as soon as i read about the freezer
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Re: funny

Postby HBS Guy » 30 Jan 2019, 20:17

Yup, an oldy but a real goody.
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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 31 Jan 2019, 04:22

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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 31 Jan 2019, 04:37

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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 31 Jan 2019, 04:42

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Re: funny

Postby SethBullock » 31 Jan 2019, 11:48

"At least he's not Hillary" - Hatty

"There's only one solution: MORE guns!" - greggerypeccary

... "mr know it all" - Bongalong
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Re: funny

Postby SethBullock » 31 Jan 2019, 12:07

Pontiac ad in 1957 ...

Pontiac.jpg
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Re: funny

Postby SethBullock » 31 Jan 2019, 12:11

Chevrolet "Texas Edition" pick-up truck ...

Chevrolet in Texas (2).jpg
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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 31 Jan 2019, 13:26

SethBullock wrote:Chevrolet "Texas Edition" pick-up truck ...

Chevrolet in Texas (2).jpg


That's only in Texas? You got hosed.
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Re: funny

Postby HBS Guy » 31 Jan 2019, 14:03

SethBullock wrote:


Absolutely fucking hilarious!
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 31 Jan 2019, 14:46

Texan wrote:Image

:c :c :c

careful, you'll get mothra after you if you keep that up :giggle :giggle
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 31 Jan 2019, 14:48

SethBullock wrote:



i like that one :c
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 31 Jan 2019, 14:49

SethBullock wrote:Pontiac ad in 1957 ...

Pontiac.jpg


imagine the outrage if they did that today :OMG
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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 31 Jan 2019, 14:59

johnsmith wrote:
Texan wrote:Image

:c :c :c

careful, you'll get mothra after you if you keep that up :giggle :giggle

As long as Mrs. Texan laughs, I’ll be ok.
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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 31 Jan 2019, 15:12

Mrs. Texan also lol’d at this one.

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Re: funny

Postby HBS Guy » 31 Jan 2019, 16:11

Just imagine the world if we changed sex as we got older, like some fish & amphibians do. :OMG
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 31 Jan 2019, 16:45

HBS Guy wrote:Just imagine the world if we changed sex as we got older, like some fish & amphibians do. :OMG



awesome, I could finally play with a pair of tits whenever i liked and no one would whinge :yahoo :yahoo :yahoo
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Re: funny

Postby Squire » 31 Jan 2019, 21:12

johnsmith wrote:
HBS Guy wrote:Just imagine the world if we changed sex as we got older, like some fish & amphibians do. :OMG



awesome, I could finally play with a pair of tits whenever i liked and no one would whinge :yahoo :yahoo :yahoo


Obesity can do the same for you.
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Re: funny

Postby Tally » 01 Feb 2019, 10:29

johnsmith wrote:
mothra wrote:
Tally wrote:Ever had a pet cockatoo? They totally rule the house.



No but my cousins did. It just ran around attacking feet.



I used to have one as a teenager. She loved the men in the house, hated the women. It barely tolerated my mum because she fed her, other women couldn't get near her. Many a time when she chased my sister through the yard, into the house, and my sister would run into her bedroom and shut the door. The cockatoo would sit there trying to chew through the door (which if you know cockatoos isn't difficult for them to do) to get to my sister. It was hilarious watching her waddle after my sister. :c

Me on the other hand, she'd ride on my shoulders and follow me around the house. Every morning when she woke up the first thing she'd do would be to yell out for me. 'John, John'. Great bird.
We later moved to a house next door to a train line ... and first train to come by at night gave her a heart attack and she died of shock.


We also had one as a family pet when I was young and it bonded to me and I can tell you, you'll never have a more loyal animal friend (maybe even more loyal than people).
Dogs love you because essentially you feed them and they can switch masters if circumstances dictate. A cocky that's bonded to you actually sees you as a lover and life partner and when separated they can suffer terrible depression which is why I don't recommend them as pets. Our cocky owned the house and would bully two very large dogs and the cat was terrified of it :bgrin
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Re: funny

Postby SethBullock » 01 Feb 2019, 11:05

Tally wrote:
johnsmith wrote:
mothra wrote:
Tally wrote:Ever had a pet cockatoo? They totally rule the house.



No but my cousins did. It just ran around attacking feet.



I used to have one as a teenager. She loved the men in the house, hated the women. It barely tolerated my mum because she fed her, other women couldn't get near her. Many a time when she chased my sister through the yard, into the house, and my sister would run into her bedroom and shut the door. The cockatoo would sit there trying to chew through the door (which if you know cockatoos isn't difficult for them to do) to get to my sister. It was hilarious watching her waddle after my sister. :c

Me on the other hand, she'd ride on my shoulders and follow me around the house. Every morning when she woke up the first thing she'd do would be to yell out for me. 'John, John'. Great bird.
We later moved to a house next door to a train line ... and first train to come by at night gave her a heart attack and she died of shock.


We also had one as a family pet when I was young and it bonded to me and I can tell you, you'll never have a more loyal animal friend (maybe even more loyal than people).
Dogs love you because essentially you feed them and they can switch masters if circumstances dictate. A cocky that's bonded to you actually sees you as a lover and life partner and when separated they can suffer terrible depression which is why I don't recommend them as pets. Our cocky owned the house and would bully two very large dogs and the cat was terrified of it :bgrin


Lol!
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 01 Feb 2019, 19:17

Squire wrote:
johnsmith wrote:
HBS Guy wrote:Just imagine the world if we changed sex as we got older, like some fish & amphibians do. :OMG



awesome, I could finally play with a pair of tits whenever i liked and no one would whinge :yahoo :yahoo :yahoo


Obesity can do the same for you.


I'm cursed. I can eat as much as I like and not put on weight. It's a burden I've had to live with for most of my life.
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 01 Feb 2019, 19:19

Tally wrote: Our cocky owned the house and would bully two very large dogs and the cat was terrified of it :bgrin


Neither my dog nor cat would go near it .She'd chase then away as soon as they got closer than a few feet :c
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Re: funny

Postby SethBullock » 01 Feb 2019, 22:29

johnsmith wrote:
Squire wrote:
johnsmith wrote:
HBS Guy wrote:Just imagine the world if we changed sex as we got older, like some fish & amphibians do. :OMG



awesome, I could finally play with a pair of tits whenever i liked and no one would whinge :yahoo :yahoo :yahoo


Obesity can do the same for you.


I'm cursed. I can eat as much as I like and not put on weight. It's a burden I've had to live with for most of my life.


Me too. The most I've ever weighed was 185 as I came out of Army basic training because I put on muscle. Over the course of my adult life after basic training I've never worked as hard at building muscle, and I gradually lost weight. Right now I weigh close to what I weighed as a high school senior. I keep reminding my friends I'm not "scrawny", I'm "slender". :roll
Last edited by SethBullock on 02 Feb 2019, 02:27, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: funny

Postby Texan » 02 Feb 2019, 00:28

I’m jealous. I spent a lot of time in the gym and put on a lot of muscle, but once I blew my ACL trying to carry that muscle on the basketball court, I became less active and put on more weight. At 52, I can bench press 300 lbs, but I’m too slow to play sports and don’t trust my knee to try. I haven’t been South of 200 lbs in 12-13 years.
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Re: funny

Postby johnsmith » 02 Feb 2019, 13:13

SethBullock wrote:
johnsmith wrote:
Squire wrote:
johnsmith wrote:
HBS Guy wrote:Just imagine the world if we changed sex as we got older, like some fish & amphibians do. :OMG



awesome, I could finally play with a pair of tits whenever i liked and no one would whinge :yahoo :yahoo :yahoo


Obesity can do the same for you.


I'm cursed. I can eat as much as I like and not put on weight. It's a burden I've had to live with for most of my life.


Me too. The most I've ever weighed was 185 as I came out of Army basic training because I put on muscle. Over the course of my adult life after basic training I've never worked as hard at building muscle, and I gradually lost weight. Right now I weigh close to what I weighed as a high school senior. I keep reminding my friends I'm not "scrawny", I'm "slender". :roll



I actually went to the doctor when I was about 22 because I had tried everything to gain weight but failed. I'd just spent 6 months on those protein shakes body builders use and not a single pound. The doctor looked at me and said 'you want to put on weight? Get married.' He was psychic.

I stayed that weight (about 70kg) for another 16 years and then I got married. After I got married I put on about 10 kg in 10 years. Although some of that may be due to my last job having being so laid back.

I've been in this new job for about 2 months now and lost about 5 kg of that already so I'm back to about 75kg
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